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2007年02月28日

ソフトオンデマンドに入社したいのですが

http://wwwww.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1172572533/

1 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:35:33.31 ID:34d61SUc0
ソフトオンデマンドに社員として入社したいのですが、
やっぱりＡＶ会社だけあってハンパじゃないです
新入社員でも、ここまで要求してきます
http://www.sod.co.jp/asx/300k/sddm563_300k.asx
入社前にやっておいた方がいいこととか教えてください
ちなみに出身大学は東大で学部は普通科

3 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:36:57.51 ID:XUaM0z0c0
普通科はねえよ

4 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:37:01.77 ID:YsQ1svDh0
ねーよｗ

7 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:38:43.91 ID:lYlTfOHW0
普通科ｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

9 名前：neat ◆egB3ku8/7M [] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:40:15.14 ID:xollTA9S0
普通科ｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

日本語しゃべれｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

10 名前：愛のVIP戦士[sage] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:40:52.90 ID:ysWckuG7O
普通科ｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

11 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:41:25.81 ID:F+2nF+Og0
>>1は女？

12 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:42:49.98 ID:BLu2ltna0
中学生の釣り決定
普通科ﾜﾛﾀ

13 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:43:44.77 ID:2P3pqhjj0
普通科ツボったｗ

14 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:44:54.04 ID:Ykjyo6L/O
ねーよｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

16 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:47:04.93 ID:R6FMcfi2O
普通科ｗｗｗｗｗ
>>1の学歴は高卒以下確定ｗｗｗ

17 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:47:06.71 ID:sR+p3tNbO
普通科はおもしろいな
>>1グッジョブ

18 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:47:30.57 ID:YaFyshb30
東大で学部は普通科

20 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:48:10.85 ID:34d61SUc0
普通科ありますよ
カメレオンとかで書いてましたし
それよりも今はソフトオンデマンドについて教えてくださいよ
ちなみに男です

21 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:48:45.65 ID:YaFyshb30
ソースはカメレオンｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

22 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:50:45.34 ID:Xl8X5+IAO
ワロタ

24 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:52:36.04 ID:bnL8z4ofO
>>1の厨加減バロス

25 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:52:47.52 ID:W5xhLWji0
>>20
人文社会系研究科とか言っとけばバレなかったものをｗｗｗｗｗ
普通科はないわｗｗｗｗｗ

26 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:53:12.35 ID:yqFhX86NO
ワロチｗｗｗｗｗ

28 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:54:31.91 ID:2WDgGfiz0
最近は東大に普通科なんてのもできたのか＾＾
時代は変わりましたね＾＾

29 名前：愛のVIP戦士[sage] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:55:32.14 ID:owMrMGpyO
普通化吹いたｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ何するんだよｗｗｗ

30 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:56:42.77 ID:bnL8z4ofO
何を基準に普通なのか問いたい

33 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 19:58:01.36 ID:TI4Z0QU/O
>>1
もっと燃料をｗ

35 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:00:21.04 ID:ZPpFYQxw0
>>1
人事にメールで聞いてみろ。
普通科なんだけど採用の可能性はありますかって

36 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:00:36.32 ID:41HLpY4K0
普通科にマジで吹いたｗｗｗｗ

37 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:01:23.18 ID:W5xhLWji0
>>1
是非>>35の言うとおりにしてみれ！
そしてＳＯＤからの返信うｐ！

38 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:01:30.61 ID:TI4Z0QU/O
>>1ﾏﾀﾞｧ-? （･∀･）っ/凵⌒☆ﾁﾝﾁﾝ

42 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:15:40.35 ID:34d61SUc0
今調べたんだけど、東大に普通科ってないんだね
じゃあ俺が４年間行った大学はいったいなんだったんだろう…

43 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:16:20.37 ID:Oa6Txvbd0
普通科があるのは高校まで！

44 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:17:51.34 ID:SnihF/720
>>42
今更慌てて調べているのﾊﾞﾛｽｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ
カメレオンとか言っちゃってたしｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

46 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:20:19.39 ID:34d61SUc0
>>44
いやちゃんと東大の普通科に通ったよ

47 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:22:10.36 ID:TI4Z0QU/O
>>46
まだ言うかｗｗｗ
厨房、お前いくつだ？ｗ

48 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:22:56.52 ID:/tp0VK7t0
東大じゃなくて東北大の間違いじゃないですか？室井さん
それにしても普通科・・・

49 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:23:05.82 ID:34d61SUc0
>>47
厨房じゃねぇし
26歳

50 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:24:28.50 ID:SnihF/720
>>49
なんというニート…

51 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:24:53.87 ID:TI4Z0QU/O
>>49
26歳で東大の普通科！！！ｗｗｗ
ダメだ、腹痛いｗ

52 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:26:43.33 ID:34d61SUc0
なんかバカにしてるけど、俺マジで凄いよ
センター無しで推薦で入った

53 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:26:43.69 ID:nUi40jIlO
普通科で国語や社会でも勉強してたのか

55 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:29:00.77 ID:4eRgspMJO
普通科ってなんだ？

57 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:29:41.43 ID:mclpTd5J0
東京大学付属の高校の普通科かもしれないじゃないか！！

58 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:29:54.09 ID:34d61SUc0
>>53
普通科だからね
５教科＋ドイツ語勉強してた
後ロボコンにも出た

59 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:29:55.71 ID:RIUn9OTwO
>>1そろそろ新しいネタ考えないとキツいぞ。

60 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:30:24.28 ID:/tp0VK7t0
>>52
えぇい、戯言はいい。ガンダムを写せ！ガンダムを！

61 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:30:44.88 ID:iL0c/sdQ0
>>52
んじゃライト受験か。
奇遇だな。俺も６年前にライト受験で東大入ったんダヨ。

62 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:30:57.55 ID:U7Wye0mK0
>>58
加藤夏希乙

63 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:31:01.03 ID:Onnjq1WkO
>>52
推薦で入ったのに自分が何学部かわからんとはﾊﾞﾛｽｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

64 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:31:31.55 ID:/+tq5K5t0
「普通科」だけで腹が痛くなった

65 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:31:41.50 ID:jTjF9vsAO
>>58
卒業証書うp

66 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:32:24.56 ID:34d61SUc0
>>63
だから普通科だって
ちゃんと読まなきゃ

67 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:33:10.23 ID:34d61SUc0
>>65
紙不足で今年から廃止になった

69 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:33:26.26 ID:Onnjq1WkO
>>66
だから東大に普通科ねえって何度言わすんだｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

高校かよｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

70 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:33:31.91 ID:s2Ry2jUW0
>>66
それは学部とは言わん。
思いっきり普通“科”って言ってるだろｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ自分でｗ

71 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:33:43.49 ID:/+tq5K5t0
普通に履歴書に東京大工協会普通科卒って書いとけばいいんじゃないの？

72 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:33:57.29 ID:jcmfaX9jO
学[部]なのに普通[化]とはこれいかに

73 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:34:39.82 ID:mclpTd5J0
東京大学普通学部普通科

エリートのみぞ知る学部
東大理Ⅰ～Ⅲ合格者の1％のみが所属できると言われてる伝説の学部

74 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:34:49.16 ID:iL0c/sdQ0
>>67
だよな。
卒業証書は全て電子データ化されて
DVDに焼かれて配布されたよなｗ

75 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:35:36.37 ID:RUabrutmO
最初のネタがウケたがどんどんつまんなくなる>>1を見てるのが辛い

76 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:35:41.19 ID:kmxYBmTm0
あらゆる試験でトップを取るのに「これくらい普通だよ？」
とか言っちゃう奴のあつまりだな

77 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:35:48.32 ID:34d61SUc0
ほんとにあるんだよぉ

78 名前：愛のVIP戦士[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:36:50.16 ID:iL0c/sdQ0
>>77
あるのは知ってるってｗ
皆、お前のことがあまりにエリートすぎて
羨ましい(うらやましい)だけなんだよｗ

82 名前：1[] 投稿日：2007/02/27(火) 20:39:54.46 ID:34d61SUc0
>>78
そうだったのか
㌧

2ch発最新ニュースはこっちへ(黒マッチョNews)

posted by 黒マッチョ at 00:55 | Comment(926) | TrackBack(0) | ネタ

この記事へのコメント

ウケた。
学部という存在に普通が在ってはイケマセン、定義の中で矛盾します、でもうけた

Posted by at 2007年02月28日 02:31

これは面白いｗｗｗｗｗｗ
早稲田大学医学部、東京大学理科Ⅳ類につづいて、
東京大学普通科が加わるやもしれん。

Posted by at 2007年02月28日 03:04

なんと5歳もサバ読みしていた！
夏川純が窮地に立たされている！
３歳どころではない、本当は５歳年齢を偽っていて、
間違いなく２８歳だ」と証言している。
と、年齢詐称が発覚してしまった上に
更に驚愕の事実が！！

Posted by 夏川純、年齢詐称発覚！なんと5歳その上… at 2007年02月28日 15:48

自衛隊とカンチガイしてるんじゃね？

Posted by 　 at 2007年02月28日 17:34

東大の普通科進学希望

Posted by 　　　 at 2007年02月28日 22:54

26にもなって大学の学部について何も知らねえって怖いな。

Posted by at 2007年03月02日 16:32

そもそも東大に推薦ないだろ。
少なくとも四年前までは。

Posted by at 2007年03月03日 01:07

普通科に通ってた割に普通じゃない>>1

Posted by at 2007年03月03日 01:53

俺は東大理科3類だ

ごめんうそ。。。

Posted by at 2007年03月03日 15:21

前に私はﾑｰﾃﾞｨｰｽﾞの汁男優は経験しているのですが、それ以外の制作スタッフの枠はございませんでしょうか。
また、障害者雇用をされて納税減税対象となれば､益々の発展に繋がると思いまして。

私の連絡先を記しておきます。
nrr28917@nifty.com
heads3.naoto@docomo.ne.jp
090-2208-0337

小生、現在求職中にございます。
何卒宜しく御検討の程お願い申し上げます。

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Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 07:08

Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 07:13

I was playing poker the other night... with Tarot cards. I got a full house and 4 people died.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 07:25

I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 07:38

If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 08:09

Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 08:19

If FORTRAN has been called an infantile disorder, then PL/I must be classified as a fatal disease.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 08:29

The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.

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Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

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If you give a man a fish, he will eat for today. If you teach him to fish, he'll understand why some people think golf is exciting.

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The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

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Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月04日 09:56

Everything that can be invented has been invented.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 10:00

Premature optimization is the root of all evil.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 10:01

It's dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that's successful enough to require a large and complex set of software

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 10:05

I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 10:54

Gentleman: Knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 10:59

You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where she is!

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 11:06

My opinions might have changed, but not the fact that I am right.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 11:22

I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 11:36

I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 12:09

Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 12:20

A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 12:21

I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 13:01

If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 13:13

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 13:45

A terrorist is someone who has a bomb, but doesn't have an air force.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 13:48

You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax -- tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 20:44

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月04日 22:23

Attention to health is life's greatest hindrance.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月05日 01:27

The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月05日 19:26

Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月05日 21:33

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月06日 20:07

A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月06日 21:55

How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月06日 23:18

I took a course in speed reading and was able to read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It's about Russia.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 00:06

Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 02:02

Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 02:09

Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 02:58

We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 03:27

Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 03:53

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 04:50

All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 05:42

My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 05:53

Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 05:56

The belief in the possibility of a short decisive war appears to be one of the most ancient and dangerous of human illusions.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 06:05

Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 06:18

Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 06:23

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 07:25

Object-oriented programming is an exceptionally bad idea which could only have originated in California.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 07:31

Why was I with her? She reminds me of you. In fact, she reminds me more of you than you do!

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 08:21

Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 08:24

Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 09:28

The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 09:31

In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 09:48

There is no idea so simple and powerful that you can't get zillions of people to misunderstand it.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月07日 10:07

I was playing poker the other night... with Tarot cards. I got a full house and 4 people died.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 10:28

I must confess, I was born at a very early age.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 11:17

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 11:32

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 12:59

Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 13:40

If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 14:38

So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said 'You've been promoted'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said 'You've been promoted again'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I Said 'I careered off the road.'

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 14:43

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 15:45

Java: the elegant simplicity of C++ and the blazing speed of Smalltalk.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 16:47

Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn't over until everyone gets their cookies.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 16:50

We don't make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 17:19

Early to rise, Early to bed, Makes a man healthy but socially dead.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 17:40

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 18:45

We have art to save ourselves from the truth.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 19:06

In Germany they first came for the Communists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn't speak up because I was a Protestant. Then they came for me - and by that time no one was left to speak up.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 19:10

If you think it's simple, then you have misunderstood the problem.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 20:34

A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 20:39

We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 21:24

If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 21:43

The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 22:17

A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月07日 23:39

Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.

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Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月08日 00:47

One morning I shot a bear in my pajamas. How it got into my pajamas I'll never know.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 00:56

I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 01:27

He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 01:34

Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 01:48

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 02:52

Humor is just another defense against the universe.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 05:37

There is no sincerer love than the love of food.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 06:38

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 07:56

You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.

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We have art to save ourselves from the truth.

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In this world, nothing is certain but death and taxes.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 12:59

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 13:17

How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 13:42

In America, anybody can be president. That's one of the risks you take.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 15:26

When ideas fail, words come in very handy.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 17:48

Sterling's Corollary to Clarke's Law: Any sufficiently advanced garbage is indistinguishable from magic.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 19:01

If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 19:09

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 20:53

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 22:49

Having the source code is the difference between buying a house and renting an apartment.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 22:53

When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 23:11

Future historians will be able to study at the Jimmy Carter Library, the Gerald Ford Library, the Ronald Reagan Library, and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月08日 23:25

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 01:33

I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 01:35

Mr. Wagner has beautiful moments but bad quarters of an hour.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 02:45

Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 02:49

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 03:06

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 03:56

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... 'til you can find a rock.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 05:05

The full use of your powers along lines of excellence.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 06:10

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 06:34

I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 08:10

Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 08:25

If it wasn't for lawyers, we wouldn't need them.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 09:31

If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 09:50

All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 10:40

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 11:29

A lady came up to me on the street, pointed at my suede jacket and said, 'Don't you know a cow was murdered for that jacket?' I said 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too'.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 11:48

I hope life isn't a big joke ... because I don't get it.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 15:20

The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 16:35

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 18:11

It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 18:38

My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 19:44

University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 20:44

Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent's eye, that charms to destroy...

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 21:49

I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 22:54

It's dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that's successful enough to require a large and complex set of software

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月09日 22:57

After every 'victory' you have more enemies.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 00:03

Premature optimization is the root of all evil.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 01:08

All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 01:18

It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 02:10

You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 02:12

We don't make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 03:18

Pardon him, Theodotus; he is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 03:27

I could not possibly fail to disagree with you less.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 03:47

Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.

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Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月10日 04:57

If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 05:31

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 05:38

If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 06:50

A terrorist is someone who has a bomb, but doesn't have an air force.

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Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.

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The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

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I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 09:03

I have spoken many a word, therefore, it is fact.

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There's many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.

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The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

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I just bought a Mac to help me design the next Cray.

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Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 13:29

Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

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I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 15:43

Copy from one, it's plagiarism; copy from two, it's research.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 15:47

The chain reaction of evil -- wars producing more wars -- must be broken, or we shall be plunged into the dark abyss of annihilation.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 16:54

Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes

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Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 19:08

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Opportunities multiply as they are seized.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 20:22

Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 20:48

I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月10日 20:56

Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月10日 21:20

Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 21:39

I've never seen anyone change his mind because of the power of a superior argument or the acquisition of new facts. But I've seen plenty of people change behavior to avoid being mocked.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 22:39

I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 22:47

Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy -- the mother.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月10日 23:49

'Everything you say is boring and incomprehensible', she said, 'but that alone doesn't make it true.'

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 00:16

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I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 00:53

A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 01:17

Men have become the tools of their tools.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 01:47

The graveyards are full of indispensable men.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 01:53

Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 01:57

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 03:02

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 03:14

Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 03:16

All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 03:22

You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 03:55

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 04:13

I have four children which is not bad considering I'm not a Catholic.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 04:41

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 04:44

If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 04:58

Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 05:10

Everywhere I go I'm asked if I think the university stifles writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 05:50

God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 05:54

If there痴 one thing I know it痴 God does love a good joke.

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Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 06:14

And the clueless shall spend their time reinventing the wheel while the elite merely use the Wordstar key mappings

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 06:52

A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'

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Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 07:29

Statistics is like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive. What they conceal is vital.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 07:34

After every 'victory' you have more enemies.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 07:51

Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 07:54

In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 08:06

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 08:49

Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF All my base are belong to you!

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 08:55

Java: the elegant simplicity of C++ and the blazing speed of Smalltalk.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 08:59

Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 09:05

There is no sincerer love than the love of food.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 09:10

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 10:03

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 10:05

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 10:05

If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 11:06

If all the world's managers were laid end to end, it would be an improvement.

Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月11日 11:49

Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 12:12

Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 12:21

Mit der Dummheit kﾃ､mpfen Gﾃｶtter selbst vergebens

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 13:16

I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 13:35

The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 13:58

The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 15:28

I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 16:26

The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 16:57

A pint of sweat, saves a gallon of blood.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 17:26

Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 18:21

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 18:29

I begin by taking. I shall find scholars later to demonstrate my perfect right.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 20:02

A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 20:41

A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 21:13

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 21:26

Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 21:35

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 23:36

There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月11日 23:43

He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 00:35

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 00:48

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 01:38

If you think it's simple, then you have misunderstood the problem.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 02:07

I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 02:26

Programming is one of the most difficult branches of applied mathematics; the poorer mathematicians had better remain pure mathematicians.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 03:20

Everybody's worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there's a really easy way: stop participating in it.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 03:48

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 04:35

My occupation now, I suppose, is jail inmate.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 05:46

We've all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月12日 16:11

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月13日 00:29

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月13日 00:34

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月13日 02:48

I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月13日 08:09

Paramount among the responsibilities of a free press is the duty to prevent any part of the government from deceiving the people.

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Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月13日 14:54

Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月14日 04:41

I have spoken many a word, therefore, it is fact.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月14日 05:25

Don't drive me crazy -- it's within walking distance.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月14日 06:33

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月14日 07:42

I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月14日 07:51

Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月14日 09:21

If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have in your hands is a non-working cat.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月14日 14:22

If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn't.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月14日 15:27

Anyone who starts a sentence, 'With all due respect ...' is about to insult you.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月14日 19:03

UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.

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I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月15日 03:37

I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

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Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月15日 05:28

We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月15日 05:33

Machine. Unexpectedly, I'd invented a time

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There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.

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Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

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We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.

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Posted by 名無しマッチョ at 2010年04月15日 20:15

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月16日 00:24

A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月16日 01:02

Is your argument that the Creator of the Universe was working under a deadline and His manager forced Him to rush inefficient designs into production?

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月16日 03:36

They show you how detergents take out bloodstains. I think if you've got a T-shirt with bloodstains all over it, maybe your laundry isn't your biggest problem.

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Gigerenzer's Law of Indispensable Ignorance: The world cannot function without partially ignorant people.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月16日 05:33

I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月16日 08:45

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.

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The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.

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Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

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A model is done when nothing else can be taken out.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月17日 10:58

The company doesn't tell me what to say, and I don't tell themwhere to stick it.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月17日 11:31

Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月17日 16:04

I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月17日 18:11

It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood... War is hell.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月18日 23:40

If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn't.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 02:31

Behind every great fortune there is a crime.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 03:53

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 04:24

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 06:42

All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 07:57

Quoting Coulter is kind of like quoting Joe McCarthy; no doubt it does well when you're pandering to a group of like-minded hate mongerers, but it earns you a well-deserved reputation as a vicious, mean-spirited airhead and intellecual lightweight in more analytical and dispassionate circles.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 08:03

Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 09:11

If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 10:39

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 12:05

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 16:27

I'm fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月19日 22:59

In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.

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Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.

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What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 06:21

Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 07:00

The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 07:32

Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 08:42

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Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 08:55

Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 10:40

The only one listening to both sides of an argument is the neighbor in the next apartment

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 12:16

I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 12:31

I'm not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 13:35

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月20日 20:55

The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月21日 00:14

To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that's ok because you'll be a mile away from him and you'll have his shoes.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月21日 01:39

In America, anybody can be president. That's one of the risks you take.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月21日 17:47

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月21日 18:11

We totally deny the allegations, and we are trying to identify the allegators.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月21日 19:58

They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月21日 21:00

The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月21日 21:36

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月21日 21:48

They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 00:10

Far too many development shops are run by fools who succeed despite their many failings.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 02:49

It's wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 03:24

It is better to be quotable than to be honest.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 14:37

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 15:58

I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 17:13

It's dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that's successful enough to require a large and complex set of software

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 18:16

Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 20:54

I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 21:30

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 21:55

Only one man ever understood me, and he didn't understand me.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 23:00

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 23:27

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月22日 23:58

DOS Computers manufactured by companies such as IBM, Compaq, Tandy, and millions of others are by far the most popular, with about 70 million machines in use worldwide. Macintosh fans, on the other hand, may note that cockroaches are far more numerous than humans, and that numbers alone do not denote a higher life form.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月23日 00:31

A picture is worth a thousand words (which is why it takes a thousand times longer to load...)

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月23日 03:04

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月23日 04:33

When I die I'm going to leave my body to science fiction.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月23日 04:59

The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney...

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月23日 05:53

Paramount among the responsibilities of a free press is the duty to prevent any part of the government from deceiving the people.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月23日 07:09

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Jesus may love you, but I think you're garbage wrapped in skin.

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Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.

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There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole.

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Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.

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The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

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Total absence of humor renders life impossible.

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Science is what people understand well enough to explain to a computer. All else is art.

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Where are we going, and why am I in this handbasket?

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Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

Posted by ????}?b?`? at 2010年04月26日 23:25

Devlin's First Law - Buyer beware: in the hands of a charlatan, mathematics can be used to make a vacuous argument look impressive. Devlin's Second Law - So can PowerPoint.

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I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

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There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.

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The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

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He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.

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A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.

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Ketchup left overnight on dinner plates has a longer half-life than radioactive waste.

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I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.

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Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them.

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The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.

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Paramount among the responsibilities of a free press is the duty to prevent any part of the government from deceiving the people.

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It's dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that's successful enough to require a large and complex set of software

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People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.

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Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.

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Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

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Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.

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Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.

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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.

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Write a wise word and your name will live forever.

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I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.

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If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.

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Minsky's Second Law: Don't just do something. Stand there.

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He managed to stupid himself right into the White House.

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To err is human -- and to blame it on a computer is even more so.

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My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

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The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.

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For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

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God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.

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The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

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